A Promise to Keep

Upset by my repeated failed attempts to revitalize this website and blog I turned to be beloved friend, mentor, and person I call “family” for her wisdom. I did not expect to hear what I did. Peg (who I nicknamed Yoda 30 years ago because of her calm compassionate wisdom) said “write the book.” She asked me to promise that I would write a book about this journey of mine and what I have learned and taught and hope for.

I couldn’t say no to her. Maybe the only person I could make this promise to. So the blog posts that follow will be the gathering of the bits and pieces of… a forthcoming book. Your wisdom, thoughts and encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

Today I will start with a short excerpt from The Cutting Edge, from Winter of 2001. The editorial was titled “Words from the Wise: An interview with Margaret Wood.” Peg. Therapist, mentor, teacher.

My first question to her was: How do you go about asking clients about Self-Inflicted Violence (SIV)?

Her answer: At intake I ask a new client about cutting and other forms of SIV in the same tone as I ask about anything else, such as alcohol use. If they say they live with SIV I ask how much and how often and if the know what it’s about. I say that the reason that I ask is because I am familiar and comfortable with it. Sometimes that acceptance will bring an admission of living with SIV. Then it can be addressed just as anything else. I may be asked when cutting will stop. I reply: “You’ll stop when you’re ready.”

The way to healing is having a safe place to be real, be understood, even if you do not understand yourself all that well. How often does that occur for people who live with self-injury? Peg created such a place. It is my intention that this be another.

Thoughts?